Guy has a faithful shoulder-perched raven, a kick-ass Gothic castle, hordes of hot young female followers, and he drives the enormous kind of bulldozer used in mining operations. His weapons of choice include the 9mm, the sawed-off shotgun, and the hatchet.
Guy is the only living person who can see zombies everywhere, controlling everything. Although he's only sixteen-years-old, he's fantastically wealthy.
With a little help from a centaur, Guy pirated trillions of dollars from various zombie institutions. Fearing Guy might expose the cold lifeless grasp they have on all aspects of human existence, the zombies made Guy's remarkable act of piracy look like a monumental sub-prime mortgage crisis.
Obviously, only an idiot would believe banks would lend money to people who could never pay it back. Fortunately for the zombies, all of humankind, the zombie food-supply, is kept in a sort of spell by supernatural creatures, who work in union with the zombies, keeping people oblivious to all the zombies in their midst. It's these poor brainwashed human beings that Guy tries to awaken from their stupor with a series of online sermons at HowToEndHumanSuffering.com.
Guy takes on the zombies and tries to end human suffering, mostly through encouraging the end of human reproduction. Recognizing the enormity of that task, he sets himself a smaller goal for the short term: overthrowing the principal of his high school, whom he blames for its deplorable condition.
Distracting Guy from his plans is a cute pink-haired girl named Baby Doll15 who has a unicorn that follows her everywhere. Guy also meets a handsome teenaged African-American ninja named Sweetie Honey who quickly becomes either his best friend or his worst enemy.